Thunder (Alpha Love - a Paranormal Werewolf Shifter Romance Book 3) Read online

  They both cry out as they reach their peak together, the world fading out until it’s just the two of them left. Her orgasm rocks her so hard that she can’t keep on her knees. Her legs fall out from under her, and she collapses onto the bed, her head hitting the soft pillow, still shaking from her climax.

  “You have no idea how important you are to me.” Ashton’s words are a whisper against her ear, as he pulls her close to him, settling her against his chest. It’s still dark outside; they have a few more hours yet until dawn. In the dark, together, it’s almost easy to forget about the harshness of the real world outside. These few hours—where they can lose themselves in each other—are like a present.

  “I know; I feel the same.” Sofie breathes the words out in a sigh of pure contentment. This is her favorite place, with him, close enough that their bodies are so intertwined that it would be impossible to decipher where one ends and the other begins.

  They haven’t said the words to each other, not those anyway. They had told each other how much they care, how connected they are, and how what they feel isn’t like anything else; but, those three little words, in the traditional order, haven’t passed their lips. Sofie tries to convince herself that she doesn’t need to hear them. They are just words, and Ashton has shown how much he cares about her. But a part of her wonders if the reason that he hasn’t said them is because he isn’t sure if that’s how he really feels.

  She thinks back to that night; the night that they had made love and Ashton had claimed her. He told her that if she were like him, a werewolf, then it would have meant that they were mates. Mates. There was a world of promise in that one word. The one time she’d asked him outright if that’s what they were, she had never gotten a response. She knew that some people might say that in itself was an answer. She wasn’t like him; that much was clear. She couldn’t help but wonder where that left them?

  She thought that it seemed almost narcissistic to be so concerned with her personal feelings and her and Ashton’s relationship when so much is going on around them. The digging of Spring Canyon was about to begin, and there was nothing that any of them could do to stop it. Ashton and his pack are about to lose their ancestral home, and that had to come first—especially since he is pack leader. She knew that their feelings for each other had to take a backseat.

  She tries to forget about the words that Gus and Lindsey had said to her in the dream, a dream that seems more real than any she’s had before. She tries to forget how she felt; how scared she was. She relaxes against Ashton’s chest, his arms snaking around her automatically, even in sleep. However, Sofie has no intention of sleeping. She feels like a little girl who doesn’t want to close her eyes in case that’s when the monsters come out. She doesn’t want a repeat performance of her dream.

  Her eyes are wide open, as she stares at the ceiling, listening to Ashton’s breathing as his chest rises and falls. She tries not to let the voice of reason in her mind—the scientific side of her brain—remind her of how little she really knows Ashton. Spending ten days with someone doesn’t make you an expert on them, especially when that someone happens to be a werewolf. Are we even the same species?

  Sofie avoids the obvious point that the words that Lindsey and Gus had said in her dream were just them voicing her own fears. She doesn’t know what it means to be like him, what it means to be were—and she never will. Now, as they lie like this, they’re so close to each other—barely a hair’s breadth between them. But there’s a distance that will always be there; the distance between what they are and the simple truth that they can never be the same.

  CHAPTER TWO

  In the morning, she tries to slip out before Ashton wakes up. She knows that in the cold light of day he’ll be more dogged with his questions over the dream that had shaken her so much. It would be easier just to avoid a confrontation altogether.

  “Where are you headed in such a rush?” Ashton’s deep voice is veiled in sleep, but it’s clear that he’s as alert as ever.

  Sofie sighs, wondering if she’ll ever manage to get the better of him. She turns to see him smiling up at her from the bed, looking sexily disheveled. How is it possible that the man permanently looks like he belongs in an underwear commercial? she thinks. She shakes her head, telling herself to focus on the task at hand.

  “Well, some of us have to work for a living.” Sofie throws a smile at him, as she pulls on her boots. “And unless I want to turn up to site wearing the same clothes as yesterday,” Sofie signals to the crumpled shorts and t-shirt she’s wearing that are still dusty from the day before, “then I have to swing by the motel.” She starts to pull her hair up into a ponytail, but Ashton’s hand on her arm stops her.

  “What if you didn’t have to swing by the motel from now on?” Ashton looks at her levelly, his eyes losing all vestiges of sleep. He’s definitely wide-awake now.

  “What do you mean?” Sofie looks at him uncertainly, nervous and excited by what she’s hoping he might be suggesting.

  “Why don’t you stay here?” Ashton cocks his head at her as he asks the question, as if it were a kind of challenge.

  “Stay here?” Sofie repeats the words slowly like she’s not sure that she’s heard Ashton correctly.

  “That’s what I said, running girl.” Ashton’s signature amused grin spreads across his face. He’s clearly enjoying having Sofie on the back foot.

  “You’re asking me to move in with you?” The words are out of Sofie’s mouth before she can modify her facial expression.

  “You don’t have to look so horrified, Sofie. A simple no would have worked.” Ashton shakes his head at her, still smiling; but, she wonders if she’s imagining a trace of hurt in his cornflower blue eyes.

  She thinks, Nice, Sofie. A guy does something that most girls can only dream about and you look at him like he’s completely crazy for wanting to be with you. “Sorry.” Sofie forces her face into a softer expression as she stretches her hand out and finds Ashton’s to hold. “It’s just, I guess I hadn’t expected it. We haven’t known each other for long and, it’s just…it’s unexpected is all.” Sofie wonders when she’d lost the ability to form actual sentences.

  “It’s alright, I’m not proposing marriage, Sofie. I just thought it’d be easier if your stuff was here. That way you wouldn’t have to try sneaking out of here every morning as soon as the sun was up.” Ashton shrugs, releasing Sofie’s hand and heading out of the bedroom, padding quietly along the wooden floor.

  Sofie stays still for a few seconds, asking herself how she had managed to screw that exchange up quite so much. Then, she silently thinks, He’s right. It isn’t a proposal of marriage; it’s a practical solution to our situation. It’s true, I’ve barely spent a night at the motel since we met. So, why did I overreact like that? I wanted some kind of clarification of what we are to each other, and now he’s giving that to me. Why do I walk away whenever things get remotely serious?

  She laces up her desert boots and heads to the kitchen, following the smell of freshly brewing coffee. Ashton keeps his back to her as she leans against the doorframe. “So, do I win the emotional retard of the year award?” Sofie smiles sheepishly, as Ashton turns around, raising an eyebrow at her.

  “Well, you definitely made the shortlist.” He hands her a cup of coffee and watches her impassively as she takes a sip.

  She knows that she hasn’t answered his question, not really, and the truth is that she doesn’t know how. So, she does the thing that she does best, she avoids it. There’s something else that she’s been meaning to broach with Ashton again anyway. She knows that she’s jumping from one difficult conversation into another, but it’s a discussion she has to start up again.

  “Have you thought any more about what we talked about? About looking for somewhere else? There are so many areas of untouched woodland, and they’re not even that far away. That list I gave you—” Sofie stops short when she sees the anger in Ashton’s expression.

  “I’ve told you al
ready. We’re not leaving,” he says through gritted teeth, and he’s holding on so tight to his coffee mug, it’s a wonder he doesn’t shatter it in his hand.

  “Ashton, it’s not safe for you here anymore. The drilling is going ahead whether you want to accept that or not. You can’t stay here,” she says, trying to keep her voice even, but she’s angry at how stubborn he’s being.

  “This is our home. This is where we belong. We were here before Shale, and we will be here long after.” Ashton’s voice is low but the warning in it is clear; he doesn’t want to continue this conversation. However, that doesn’t stop Sofie from pushing forward with it anyway.

  “And what about if someone gets hurts, huh?” she says, raising her voice, slamming the coffee cup down on the counter. “In case you’ve forgotten, Shale has called in guards on the site. He’s just begging for an excuse to lead them into the woods with orders to shoot on sight. If you don’t leave, then you’re putting the pack at risk.”

  Ashton’s voice is a growl, and she can feel the heat of his anger radiating off of him. “I will not be the Alpha that loses the only home we have known for centuries. We will find a way to survive. We always do.”

  “So this is about pride for you? You don’t want to go down in history as the Alpha that leaves! Well, how about being the Alpha that gets his pack killed? Is that a better way to be remembered?” She knows that she’s being harsh, but Ashton has been ignoring the reality of what is going on, and time is running out for them.

  “Don’t accuse me of pride. I have given my life to this pack. The pack comes before everything, before everyone. There is nothing more important to me, nothing.” Ashton levels a look at her, and Sofie wonders if that includes her. She figures that it probably does. She tries to remind herself that she can’t be hurt by his words. She can’t expect him to put her above the pack. He’d made that perfectly clear. She picks up the car keys as she walks past him, heading out to the door. “Just think about it, Ashton. There’s no shame in moving on.”

  “Moving on? You mean running away. There is no honor in that. That’s not how we live. We are descendants of Lupo, the First. This is where we belong, and we will fight to keep it.” His explanation is simple, but the strength behind it is undeniable. “You wouldn’t understand.”

  Ashton’s words are so close to what Lindsey and Gus had told her in her dream that she stops dead in front of the screen door. “No, I guess I wouldn’t. How could I after all? I’m just your average, run-of-the-mill human.” She tries to keep the hurt out of her voice but fails miserably. Plus, she hasn’t finished what she needs to say. “In case you haven’t been keeping up-to-date with the news, public opinion isn’t exactly landing in your favor.”

  Ashton waves away the comment, dismissing it outright, which only serves to make Sofie even angrier. “Anyone that’s grown up in Beaumont knows about the legends of the wolves in the woods. They’ve never had any problem with it before; there’s no reason why that should change.” Ashton seems so sure about what she’s saying that it almost makes Sofie question her own judgment—almost.

  “Ash, I know you have this belief that people are inherently good and that they care about what they’re doing to the natural world. However, the cold hard truth is that this town was hit by the recession—and it was hit hard. If it comes down to choosing between protecting an animal that they’re being persuaded to think would kill them as soon as look at them and a guy who is offering them jobs and more cash than they’d be able to make doing anything else in this town, it’s kind of a no-brainer.” Sofie takes a breath, trying to remember that sometimes hitting someone over the head with reality isn’t exactly the best way to get them to see your point of view.

  “Not everyone thinks that money is the most important thing in the world, Sofie.” Ashton’s words are flung at her like acid, and she can’t help but recoil as they hit their mark.

  “That’s not fair.” She struggles to get the words out, and the instant regret on Ashton’s face tells her that he hadn’t meant what he said. However, he had said it anyway.

  “Look, I’m sorry. That’s not what I think. I don’t know why I said that.” Ashton shakes his head, angry at himself.

  Sofie can feel the hurt bubbling up inside of her. She knows that she has to get out of there fast. She has no intention of letting Ashton see how much his throwaway comment has hurt her, and she’s determined to retain at least a little dignity.

  “It’s fine,” she shrugs like it’s no big deal, avoiding his eyes. “I’ve heard worse. I better go if I don’t want to be late.” Sofie doesn’t even wait for a response before slamming the door behind her.

  She gets in her rental and drives away as quickly as she can. She tries to reconcile the idea of Ashton asking her to leave the motel and come stay with him with the argument they’ve just had. It seems like they’ve gone from being tightly wound together to completely pulled apart in a matter of a few hours. Get a grip on yourself, Braun, she tells herself as she heads towards the center of town. Ashton has only offered you a drawer, Braun, and for a limited time only.

  She realizes that they both keep on neatly avoiding the reality that they’re on borrowed time, perhaps that’s why these arguments seem to spring out of nowhere. There is so much that neither of them is willing to say, but it has to come out somewhere. Sofie knows that her life is still in Washington, and eventually she will go back while Ashton will stay with his pack. He’s made it clear that they’re his priority; nothing else measures up to the responsibility that rests on his shoulders.

  She knows that she will always come second. That much is clear from his devotion to the pack. Plus, she would never ask him to leave his duties behind, to let his birthright fall by the wayside. She would never want that for him, and she would never make him choose between her and his pack. It would be an impossible choice. That’s what she tells herself, but a small part of her can’t help wishing that his decision weren’t such a foregone conclusion.

  ***

  Pulling into the canyon is a very different experience to what it was just a few days ago. Then, it had just been Sofie, Darwin, and Finn, a few pieces of equipment, and nothing else, just the beautiful surroundings. Now, it was a completely different story.

  The diggers had started to move in, and the canyon was a flurry of activity. They’d had to set up a dedicated human resources office, just to deal with all the local people applying for jobs on the site.

  Sofie catches sight of Finn waving at her from the other side of the site. “Jeez, I’ve seen shorter lines at Disneyworld.” Sofie nods towards the queue of men and women that snakes from the human resources office and out into the distance. “How long have they been waiting there for? The office doesn’t even open for another hour.”

  “They were here when I arrived. Guess some people could really use these jobs.” Finn fans himself with the schedule for the day before handing her a copy. “You alright? You look a little…” Finn trails off but makes an expression of wide-eyed mania.

  “You look constipated when you do that,” Sofie nudges him gently in the arm. It’s a relief to have fallen back into their pseudo-sibling banter. She knows that he had been hurt when she’d shut him out, and she would love to share what she knows about the canyon and the wolves that it hides. However, it’s not her secret to tell. As Gus would probably point out without a second thought—she has no right to pass the story on to anyone else.

  “Ha ha, so what’s the deal? You and lover boy have a little tiff?” Finn raises an eyebrow, unable to conceal his glee at the prospect of some genuine gossip. If there was one thing that Finn loved more than a good love story, it was a good break-up story.

  “If a tiff is when you feel like your insides have just been pulled out, then I guess that’s what it was,” she says without making eye contact with her friend, as she looks over the schedule for the day.

  “Damn, Sofe. I was just kidding. You wanna talk about it?” Finn’s heart is in the right place
; it always has been. However, he’s about as comfortable having heart-to-hearts as he is walking on hot coals.

  “Not really, but thanks Finn.” Sofie smiles encouragingly at him, pretending that she doesn’t see the relief flooding his face. “Any update on our little tech problem?” She doesn’t have to say anything more than that. They both know what she’s talking about.

  Finn looks around to make sure that there’s no one close enough to overhear what he’s about to say. “I’m still feeding the server back at Shale HQ with false data so it thinks that it’s monitoring the activity on our phones and laptops. But it’s not going to last forever, as soon as someone takes a closer look at the data they’re going to realize that something isn’t quite right with it,” says Finn. He’s typically nonchalant in his thick-framed glasses and hipster skinny jeans, but now he looks more than a little agitated.

  “I thought you said they wouldn’t be able to trace what you were doing?” Sofie furrows her brow, knowing how bad it could potentially be if Shale found out that they had hacked their system. Luke would have all of their heads on a platter in a matter of hours.

  “It was never supposed to be a permanent solution!” says Finn, as he crosses his arms. Sofie recognizes the defensive pose immediately.

  “I’m not questioning your ability, Finn,” she placates him. “However, we need to make sure that Shale doesn’t figure out that we know they’ve been spying on us.” Sofie holds her fingers to her temple. She can feel a headache coming on, and it’s not even 9 a.m.